What’s Your Silver Lining?

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May 1, 2020

He spent day after day feeling uneasy and muddled, like someone who has mistakenly swallowed a thick swatch of cloud.

Haruki Murakami

The stay-at-home routine has been a huge shake-up for everyone. It has been unsettling, to say the least. But there is always a silver lining to these kinds of events, even if we don’t see it at first.

I had a big awakening several years back when my health was suddenly taken away from me. I had to learn that I am not what I do. This was hard for me at first because I have always liked being in action and doing stuff, producing stuff. I had to learn to appreciate that I was enough just being. I also had to learn to ask for help — something I wasn’t very good at back then.

Right now, self-care has never been more important. As women we tend to put everyone else’s needs before our own, and then we get depleted, exhausted, cranky, or worse.

My health “event” taught me how to take better care of myself. This was my silver lining.

Time out for you

I love to get in the tub and immerse myself in warm water. Maybe your self-care means going for a walk or listening to music. Whatever it is, make the time and claim it for yourself. The irony is that when we take time for ourselves, we have more to give to others, not less.

It’s so important that you carve out some quality time for yourself everyday. It doesn’t have to be a big deal. Take a little time when you don’t do anything. You just be. Take a moment to listen to your inner wisdom. To breathe. To ground yourself.

Be grateful for what you have

If you already have a gratitude practice that’s wonderful. If not, I encourage you to start and end your day thinking about some things that you are grateful for. Write them down in a journal or just say them to yourself. This one habit can change your entire outlook on life and generate positive energy (and there is plenty of science to back this up). Rather than focus on the fear of getting sick. Be grateful for the health you have now. Look for the  silver lining.

A life well-examined

Consider this time at home an invitation to reboot. What has been tugging at your heartstrings lately? What have you been wanting more of, or less of, and why? Is being alone hard for you? Or do you crave time to yourself? Rather than being preoccupied with worry, support yourself to feel complete just as you are, even now during this unpredictable period.

This is a good time to give thought to your morning routine. You may need to adjust it so that it nurtures you throughout the day. Having a schedule can also help when time seems limitless. Astronauts, like John Kelly, say this is how they deal with being out in space for long periods.

Of course nourishing yourself with healthy foods is a must now. Before you feed yourself, pause and notice what it is your body — and spirit — really need. Taking care of yourself, eating well, and getting the proper rest your body needs fortifies your immune system. Along these lines, you will want to be mindful not to let Zoom or other screen time monopolize too much of your day.

Instead, make sure to get outside in the fresh air at least once a day. Spend time talking to and simply being with your companions. Give up the notion you have to do everything. Just be you. That is enough. You are enough, exactly as you are. This is your silver lining.

Wishing you a Gorgeously Healthy life,


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  • Thank you, Gay, for this lovely, soothing, reassuring, inspiring message. It was good to be reminded about your huge event which I remember your sharing with us while you went through it, so bravely and steadfastly. All your suggestions are perfect for this time, and we can’t get too many reminders. Weekly collage is helping me stay sane and happy!
    Blessings and love, Barbara

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